Why We Get Success Wrong

In today’s world, success is often seen as a straight road that only moves forward. From the moment we start our careers or build our businesses, society tells us that progress means speed, growth, and constant forward motion. If you slow down or take a step back, people assume you are failing. But the truth is far from that.

Sometimes, the most powerful thing you can do is stop and return. Returning does not mean you have failed. It does not mean you have lost your way. In fact, it means the opposite. Returning is about realignment. It is about coming back to what truly matters—your purpose, your values, and your relationships.

Just like businesses track ROI, which means Return on Investment, real leaders ask deeper questions. They ask, What is my return on integrity? What is my return on relationships? What is my return on purpose? These questions lead to a different kind of success—one that is sustainable, meaningful, and fulfilling.

If you have ever felt burned out, disconnected, or like you are running fast but not going anywhere, this message is for you. Let’s explore why returning matters and how it can change everything for your life, leadership, and business.

The Types of Return That Truly Matter

When people think about return, they usually think about money. They think about profit margins, sales numbers, and financial growth. While those things are important, they are not the whole story. Life and leadership are about more than numbers. Here are four types of return that matter just as much—if not more:

1. Return on Investment

Yes, financial ROI matters. Businesses need profit to survive. But if all you measure is money, you will miss the bigger picture. Financial ROI does not measure happiness, purpose, or integrity.

2. Return on Integrity

This type of return asks a simple but powerful question: Are your actions aligned with your values? Do you make decisions that feel right, even when no one is watching? Integrity is the foundation of trust. Without it, even the biggest success will feel empty.

3. Return on Influence

Your leadership leaves a mark. It shapes how people think, feel, and behave. Ask yourself: What impact am I having on the people around me? How will my team, customers, and even my family remember my leadership?

4. Return on Identity

Are you still true to who you are? Or have you lost yourself in the pursuit of success? Bob Marley said it best:
“Don’t gain the world and lose your soul.”

My Personal Story of Returning

Several years ago, I was traveling the world, consulting on leadership and organizational culture. On the outside, it looked like I had everything I ever wanted. I had clients, money, and constant movement. From the outside, it looked like success.

But inside, I was exhausted. I had drifted away from my original “why.” I was no longer leading from a place of passion and love. I was simply managing through momentum, working harder and harder without feeling fulfilled.

One night, alone in a hotel room in Zanzibar, I asked myself a question that changed everything: “If I keep living like this, what am I really building?”

The answer scared me. I realized I had to make a change. I had to return—not to a physical place, but to myself. I returned to my values: presence, purpose, people, and love.

That choice changed everything. It gave birth to my most impactful work—what I now call Love-Driven Leadership.

The lesson is simple: Returning is not failure. Returning is alignment.

The Cost of Never Returning

Many people believe they can keep running without ever pausing. They think that if they keep pushing, everything will eventually fall into place. But the truth is, when you never stop to realign, you pay the price—with your health, your relationships, and even your business.

The research is clear:

77% of employees worldwide say they are disengaged at work, according to Gallup.

58% of leaders admit to feeling lonely and isolated, based on a study by Harvard Business Review.

Burnout and a lack of alignment with values are among the top reasons executives quit, according to Deloitte.

When there is no space for reflection and recalibration, burnout becomes the norm. The cost of never returning is too high to ignore.

The Five Rs of a Holistic Return

So how do you return? Here are five powerful steps you can take to bring balance back into your life and leadership:

1. Return to Purpose

Ask yourself: Why did I start this journey in the first place? Go back to your original mission. Make sure your goals and metrics align with your values, not just with profit.

2. Return to People

Business is built on relationships. Reconnect with your team. Rebuild trust. Show empathy and care. As John Maxwell says:
“People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.”

3. Return to Process

Excellence is not about chaos. It is about systems that work. Ask yourself if your current processes are sustainable—or if they are burning people out.

4. Return to Presence

In a world full of distractions, presence is rare. Be the person who truly shows up. Be present for your team, your family, and your own calling.

5. Return to Power—Through Rest

Power does not come from constant pushing. It comes from pausing. Some of your best ideas will come when you are still, not when you are stressed. Even God rested. What makes you think you do not need rest?

How Returning Helps Businesses Grow

Returning is not just good for people—it is good for business. Take Amazon, for example. Their return policy was not just about refunds. It was about building trust. That trust turned into loyalty, and loyalty turned into long-term profit.

Apple is another great example. When Steve Jobs returned to simplicity, the company experienced its greatest breakthrough. Innovation came from clarity, not complexity.

Holistic return brings customer trust, stronger brands, happy employees, and sustainable profits.

What Returning Means for Leadership and Life

Great leaders do not just move forward without thinking. They pause. They reflect. They return to what is true. They return to their team, their purpose, and their inner voice.

Returning is an act of humility and strength. It says:
“I am willing to reflect and realign so what I build lasts.”

The same is true for life. If you feel disconnected from someone you love, return. If you feel lost in your faith, return. The prodigal son was not rejected when he returned home. He was welcomed—not for being perfect, but for choosing to come back.

Practical Tips to Start Returning Today

Here are some simple ways to begin:

Create a monthly return ritual. Take time to reflect on what is working and what is not.

Return before you burn. Do not wait for exhaustion. Schedule time for rest and reflection.

Ask your team: What do we need to return to? Make return part of your company culture.

Track more than money. Measure energy, creativity, and connection.

Share your own return stories. Show that reflection is strength, not weakness.

My Final Thoughts

The most powerful move is not always forward. Sometimes, it is inward. Returning is not going backward—it is going deeper. It is choosing wisdom over noise, wholeness over hustle, and love over fear.

When you return whole, you do not just make progress—you make history.